Dallas and his girl..=)

This is Dallas and Suzy. AKA my little sister. I absolutely love this little girl. This is Allison (most you you know Allison), her little sister. She's 11 years old and is the biggest sweetheart. This is their first time really seeing each other while 'dating' and both were reeally nervous. Aren't they just adorable?!







This is Suzanne and her Mom, Martha, and Dallas. Martha HAD to get in the picture. I find it funny how Dallas smiled better in this picture and doesn't look as nervous because Martha is in this picture! LOL Sucha cuuuuute trio! LOL






Suzanne is one of the best pitchers in her league. And shes one of the youngest, but that doesn't stop her. She's a good little softball player! She had a double header and has really improved! Keep it up Suzy Que! Love ya sweetheart!




Here she is pitching again....yeah you get em SUZ!











So where has Steph been? Well its a hard question to answer. There are plenty of excuses, but I'm sure you all are just on the edge of your seat wanting to know....so...here it goes...
1. Sometimes I feel like Miranda and Mom are the only one's who read this blog. So what's the use? First off, Miranda probably knows me best, and sometimes I don't want my mom to know EVERYTHING I'm thinking. See...you all get to write freely. No one reads your blogs like your mom. Not that I say anything my mom can't know I just like to keep to myself sometimes.
2. Comments are usually from the only 2 who I believe read it....here and there I'll get a comment from someone else...but its just like ok...should I really even bother writing? Its like if someone interupts you while you're talking, and then they apologize but then when you go to keep going on with what you are talking about you forget. It's like well no one really reads it, and if they do....they comment but are they just commenting so I will keep adding more drama to their life to read? Do people really understand that words mean more than just reading them...its the person's feelings!
3. Sometimes I just feel too depressed to write. Writing use to help, but now--I just feel even more depressed. It use to help, but now when I vent I have to realize other eyes see what I'm writing and I don't want to be a stumbeling block for them. People need encouragement not more and more stress and depression.
4. Miranda will laugh at this, I have POTS. You all won't ever understand it until you would HAVE it. Sometimes I just wanna lay there and feel my heart beat. Sometimes that takes everything out of me just to count my heart beating. Yes, I feel better, but some days are worse than others. Some days I can't move. Does anyone know what its like to be 17 and feel like you're 80 years old? I just told mom the other day that I NEED a shower chair. Do you know how embarrassing that is?
5. I like someone. Alot. But I don't know it's going to work out. I've given it to God, I'm praying and trying to see if he's the right guy. What if he isn't and I date him? What if he is? (Uggh I hate what ifs!) But I've been spending more time trying to figure out our situation.
6. I'm a senior and I want to know what I'm going to do for the rest of my life! I'm real sick so I have to take that into consideration. But I'm not gonna be one of those people who get a degree for nothing. I'm going to college for a reason! I want to get a job, be able to support myself, before I think about marriage or even a family. I'm not even sure what to do...I know what I WANT to do, but what do I NEED to do?

Wow...so there's so much more on my mind. But just soo you all know--I am still alive. I do still care and love you all very much. I'll try and keep updating more regular than every 2 months. I hope you all can forgive me. And maybe I'll get more in the BLOGMOOD and blog more often....