Living a Lie

You know lieing is horrible. But it's even worse when you lie to the ones that you love most. You try to hide feelings but feelings can't always be hidden. I try so hard. I've tried and tried--I can't hide my feelings. That's when my depression starts. I don't need this medication I'm on. If I could just start living like Jesus this life would be a lot better.

I wish that people could understand my feelings. Maybe I wouldn't have to lie. But no one cares what I think/feel/ or say. They have their own opinions on how things should go. And if I don't meet up to that--theyre angry. So I have tried to hide everything. If I tell someone exactly how I feel theyre going to be angry so I try to hide it, and somehow they find out I've been hiding it. Everytime. Sometimes I just wish I was young all over again when you lied about hitting your brother and you got punished for that.

I have learned lieing to someone who is your best friend in all the world is a huge mistake. I can't sleep or eat.

I think I'm done now.